a likely incomplete taxonomy of headcanon types

[stardust_rifle]

There are three places that a headcanon can come from, for me, and three parts of myself that it can satisfy. Headcanons that are absolutely peak satisfy all three.

BRAINCANON: Does this headcanon fit as a logical extension of what was shown in canon? Does this solve a plot hole or make canon make more sense? If so, then you have on your hands a headcanon that satisfies THE BRAIN.

HEARTCANON: Does this headcanon make canon more emotionally resonant for you? Does it make you feel emotions in your soul? If so, then you have on your hands a headcanon that satisfies THE HEART.

COCKCANON: Does this headcanon make you horny? Does it make (a) character(s) seem hotter to you? If so, then you have on your hands a headcanon that satisfies THE COCK.



For example, I headcanon Mayoi Ayase Enstars as being a CSA victim. This explains some of his canonical behavior (making it a BRAINCANON), makes him more relatable as a character/makes me very sad (making it a HEARTCANON), and also, to some degree, arouses me (making it a COCKCANON).

In contrast, "Noriaki Kakyoin was psychiatrically abused as a child" is primarily a HEARTCANON (it makes me feel a great amount of emotions/makes him more relatable/makes the Death 13 fight more agonizing to watch) with a very tiny amount of BRAINCANON (for all we know it could have happened) and no amount of COCKCANON (the idea doesn't really arouse me)

My "Mondstaters practice something akin to Tibetan sky burial" is primarily a BRAINCANON (they worship a god of wind and think dying in a place without wind is a horrible fate, because it means your soul doesn't get to go to the afterlife) with almost no amount of HEARTCANON or COCKCANON.

Finally, my "Risotto Nero JJBA has a big-ass dick" (at least in verses where he has a dick) is primarily a COCKCANON (the idea arouses me). (I was going to say that it was also a BRAINCANON, because "bigger guys tend to be bigger" but I googled that and it turns out that the science is conflicting on that. Whoops.)

Comments

[palominocorn]

Excellent analysis, and I agree.

I do have a fourth type: FISTCANON. This is for things that I decide to headcanon out of spite toward some awful group of fans that hate this headcanon.

[scissorsevered]

As for that last headcanon, I distinctly remember there being this big poll on Twitter a few years back where people had to vote to see who had the biggest dick in all of JJBA. Surprise surprise, Risotto won.