stardust_rifle

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I did it.

I did it!

In the month of February, I wrote 27* pieces of BruAbba fanfiction covering almost 30,000 words. I have no idea how this happened, but I have learned the important lesson that if I put my mind to it, I can overcome my character flaw of not being able to finish any of my artistic projects (or this was just reinforcing my well-known character flaw of not being able to do anything without a deadline breathing down my neck, which I already knew about myself.)

I’m going to do a retrospective, rereading everything I wrote and ranking them in order of quality-in-my-completely-objective-and-flawless-opinion, from worst to best, as well as providing some behind-the-scenes information on my creative process/stuff that didn’t make it in. Also, for reference, “Maria” is the name I use for fem!Bruno for thematic reasons.

*Why 27? Because I loathed the prompt for Day 22 (Hiccups) and Day 29 (Free Day) is still cooking it will be published eventually I prommy.

leone you’re ruining the trope (M!Bruno/M!Leone, word count: 998, Day 13: Storm)

uuuuuuurrrrrgggghhhh I hate hate hate this one. The premise is pretty okay, and I like the twist that Bruno had actually masterminded the whole thing to figure out if Leone was actually into him (part of my “bruno is a fucking weirdo” agenda) but the entire fic just moves way too fast to actually impart any emotions on the reader. Reading it just made me feel like I was looking at a desiccated skeleton. Like it’s got the foundation of something good, but what else?

ABBACCHIO PINING: 8/10

ABBACCHIO PHYSICAL PAIN: 1/10

ABBACCHIO EMOTIONAL PAIN: 8/10

HORNY: 7/10

SILLY: 2/10

FINAL SCORE: 4/10

well i guess everyone learned something today (M!Bruno/M!Leone, word count: 478, Day 27: Lesson)

mgoniiognoignkogn this just feels sloppy and boring and like it’s trying to be funny but it just keeps falling on its face.

ABBACCHIO PINING: 3/10

ABBACCHIO PHYSICAL PAIN: 0/10

ABBACCHIO EMOTIONAL PAIN: 1/10

CATHOLICISM: 1/10

HORNY: 2/10

SILLY: 3/10

FINAL SCORE: 4/10

bruno bucciarati needs to get some fucking sleep (M!Bruno/M!Leone, word count: 670, Day 25: Rest)

The premise is okay, and there are some good lines, but I don’t like this. It feels generic.

ABBACCHIO PINING: 2/10

ABBACCHIO PHYSICAL PAIN: 1/10

ABBACCHIO EMOTIONAL PAIN: 2/10

CATHOLICISM: 1/10

HORNY: 0/10

SILLY: 4/10

FINAL SCORE: 5/10

cracks in the foundation: may crumble over time (C2) (M!Bruno/F!Leone, word count: 691, Day 5: Wither)

Aaaaaagggghhhhh. The concept is fine, but I hate the prose, especially the prose used to describe the weather and it’s just too short to really get into the emotions Leone’s feeling. I think she comes to the conclusion that she doesn’t really love Bruno anymore way too quickly to have any kind of emotional impact. Not my best work, especially compared to the setup in Chapter 1.

ABBACCHIO PINING: 5/10

ABBACCHIO PHYSICAL PAIN: 1/10

ABBACCHIO EMOTIONAL PAIN: 8/10

CATHOLICISM: 0/10

HORNY: 0/10

SILLY: 0/10

FINAL SCORE: 5.5/10

we were both wrong (M!Bruno/M!Leone, word count: 100, Day 19: We’re Both Wrong)

Oh, you can tell that this was when my buffer ran out and I wasn’t prewriting anymore. It’s mildly funny, especially the end, but. Meh. This provokes no emotions in me. It’s fine.

ABBACCHIO PINING: 0/10

ABBACCHIO PHYSICAL PAIN: 0/10

ABBACCHIO EMOTIONAL PAIN: 1/10

CATHOLICISM: 0/10

HORNY: 1/10

SILLY: 4/10

FINAL SCORE: 6/10

pizza (M!Bruno/M!Leone, word count: 439, Day 9: Sharing)

It’s fine. It has a fun little finishing joke, just. I can’t really muster up any emotions about this. It feels vaguely generic and not me. There’s just so much narrative distance that the reader isn’t in the head of either Leone or Bruno, which isn’t something I like very much.

ABBACCHIO PINING: 1/10

ABBACCHIO PHYSICAL PAIN: 1/10

ABBACCHIO EMOTIONAL PAIN: 1/10

CATHOLICISM: 0/10

HORNY: 0/10

SILLY: 6/10

FINAL SCORE: 6/10

worried (just a bit) (M!Bruno/F!Leone, word count: 100, Day 28: Miss You)

It’s perfectly fine and cute and I do like how I characterized Bruno, like he is Dedicated To The Mission and Does Not Show Emotion apart from when he does. Because he misses his wife. Again, cute!

ABBACCHIO PINING: N/A/10

ABBACCHIO PHYSICAL PAIN: 1/10

ABBACCHIO EMOTIONAL PAIN: N/A/10

CATHOLICISM: 1/10

HORNY: 1/10

SILLY: 6/10

FINAL SCORE: 6/10

it’s cold (M!Bruno/F!Leone, word count: 312, Day 14: Cold)

Again, It’s fine. It’s short and doesn’t really have like, a plot, but I do like the banter between Bruabba better than in pizza. It’s just so short that I can’t really analyze it more or express any feelings about it.

ABBACCHIO PINING: 0/10

ABBACCHIO PHYSICAL PAIN: 1/10

ABBACCHIO EMOTIONAL PAIN: 0/10

CATHOLICISM: 0/10

HORNY: 0/10

SILLY: 5/10

FINAL SCORE: 6/10

Interrogation (M!Bruno/M!Leone, word count: 100, Day 24: Alibi)

Cute, witty, just wish it had a stronger ending. I like some of the analogies I used.

ABBACCHIO PINING: 1/10

ABBACCHIO PHYSICAL PAIN: 0/10

ABBACCHIO EMOTIONAL PAIN: 1/10

CATHOLICISM: 0/10

HORNY: 3/10

SILLY: 7/10

FINAL SCORE: 6.5/10

leone abbacchio is down bad (M!Bruno/M!Leone, word count: 100, Day 26: Selfish)

Oh, for being so short I adore this. “fingers in his hair like he’s some woman Abbacchio had the misfortune of loving” is such a good and crunchy lovely amazing line and it’s very good at the Abbacchio Self-Loathing Pining POV. Good job, me!

ABBACCHIO PINING: 7/10

ABBACCHIO PHYSICAL PAIN: 1/10

ABBACCHIO EMOTIONAL PAIN: 6/10

CATHOLICISM: 5/10

HORNY: 2/10

SILLY: 0/10

FINAL SCORE: 6.5/10

sticky fingers am i right *wiggles eyebrows* (M!Bruno/F!Leone, word count: 1,597, Day 2: Misbehaving Stands)

This is a fun idea, I utterly adore the personalities I gave to Moodyfingers and just the general concept, but it’s. There’s something about the formatting and prose that’s bugging me and keeping the fic from being as hot as it could be. I also think there’s something about how quickly I brushed over Moodyfingers actually fucking that harms the work’s erotic appeal. I do really like the part I put in about Sticky Fingers being sweet to Leone, “Stand really really really loves the person their user is in love with” is one of my favorite JJBA fanfic tropes.

ABBACCHIO PINING: 1/10

ABBACCHIO PHYSICAL PAIN: 2/10

ABBACCHIO EMOTIONAL PAIN: 1/10

CATHOLICISM: 0/10

HORNY: 10/10

SILLY: 2/10

FINAL SCORE: 6.5/10

cleaning up the mess (M!Bruno/F!Leone, word count: 655, Day 17: Clean Up Your Mess)

Oh god the amount of brainstorming I had to do to wrangle this prompt into something that I didn’t loathe. Anyways, it’s Outsider POV, my old favorite trope! I just love that Pinza has no fucking idea what’s going on until the very end- I think the abruptness of the ending works great for comedy- when I was rereading this it made me laugh out loud. Again, it’s just short and I don’t personally like it as much as some other fics with the same final score that are above it.

ABBACCHIO PINING: 1/10

ABBACCHIO PHYSICAL PAIN: 0/10

ABBACCHIO EMOTIONAL PAIN: 1/10

CATHOLICISM: 0/10

HORNY: 0/10

SILLY: 6/10

FINAL SCORE: 7/10

paperwork, that great enemy (F!Bruno/F!Leone, word count: 787, Day 10: Coffee)

I like the general tone of the narration- I took a more snarky approach while not sacrificing getting into the character’s heads, also I like the characterization. However, the prompt is kind of bland, which is why I tried to spice it up at the start, which I think kind of worked but I abandoned that tone near the end. I also don’t like the ending, it just seems kind of boring and generic.

ABBACCHIO PINING: 2/10

ABBACCHIO PHYSICAL PAIN: 0/10

ABBACCHIO EMOTIONAL PAIN: 4/10

CATHOLICISM: 0/10

HORNY: 1/10

SILLY: 6/10

FINAL SCORE: 7/10

A Summer Apart (M!Bruno/F!Leone, word count: 3,601, Day 3: Children)

I like the premise and I think I executed it decently, but it was a bit too ambitious for the timeframe and my general level of experience. A different author could have totally done it better, in my opinion, especially if they decided to make it a multichap. I’m still irritated by my difficulty in writing convincing child characters, god the fact that they spend most of the fic sitting and watching birds without talking irritates me because I’m not sure if that’s developmentally appropriate or makes sense as like, a thing that children of that age enjoy doing. I wouldn’t know, my favorite hobby as a child was walking in circles for hours on end while muttering to myself. Speaking of which, Bruno! Now that I’m reading this he just comes off as Very Fucking Autistic (*m writing* “don’t all children primarily understand social rules as ‘people will get mad at me if i do this, so i shouldn’t do it?’”) which is fine, it’s just funny. I do think I did a good job writing The Trans Stuff and making sure that their understanding of their genders like, makes sense for trans kids in late 80s-early 90s Italy. They’re not very woke about it. It’s okay.

(a little behind-the-scenes thing: when i write bruno’s father as being trans-accepting, it’s coming from a position of “thank FUCK i have a son instead of a daughter, i have no idea how to deal with women”. just wanted to add that because it probably didn’t come across and i wanted to mention it. ANYWAYS)

ABBACCHIO PINING: 3/10

ABBACCHIO PHYSICAL PAIN: 0/10

ABBACCHIO EMOTIONAL PAIN: 5/10

CATHOLICISM: 4/10

HORNY: 0/10

SILLY: 2/10

FINAL SCORE: 7/10

something pathetic and wanting (M!Bruno/M!Leone, word count: 857, Day 15: Jealousy)

Great premise, really adore how I dug into exactly what Leone would feel towards Giorno, because we don’t get a good sense of the exact nature of his feelings besides hatred. I wanted it to be pathetic, to be contemptible, to be based in absolutely nothing, and I wanted Leone to be aware of this and wind up only using it as fuel for his own further self-loathing. The main problem is the fact that it’s just not long enough for me to really dig into the core of what I wanted to explore- I think it could be better if I included more examples, but the problem is that there aren’t really many spaces within VA that you can go “oh well you can’t SAY this didn’t happen” if you want to be canon-compliant, which I did. Also, I could have done better with the prose- there’s something about it that bugs me even as I find most of the individual uses of language to be quite good.

ABBACCHIO PINING: 6/10

ABBACCHIO PHYSICAL PAIN: 3/10

ABBACCHIO EMOTIONAL PAIN: 7/10

CATHOLICISM: 2/10

HORNY: 1/10

SILLY: 1/10

FINAL SCORE: 7/10

All Dressed Up For A Hit And Run (M!Bruno/M (for now)!Leone, word count: 3,079, Day 20: Undercover)

First, the good parts. I love the opening bits and the banter between the Bucci Gang, it’s just great and really enjoyable to read. Also, Trademark Leone Abbacchio Down Bad Moment(s): god do I have to pick just one, uhh wanting to die kissing Bruno because he doesn’t believe he’ll ever be that happy ever again seems good, also really proud of how I wrote Leone’s egg-ness, I think I did a good job at weaving it in without making it too obvious and blatant. On the other hand, rereading the love confession at the end, I loathe it, it’s just too Generically Romantic and it’s a good lesson in not letting myself be carried away by yamada_yui_rolling_in_bed.gif type emotions and actually look at what I’m writing. However I do love Bruno’s last line. Fuck that bitch up.

ABBACCHIO PINING: 8/10

ABBACCHIO PHYSICAL PAIN: 2/10

ABBACCHIO EMOTIONAL PAIN: 8/10

CATHOLICISM: 2/10

HORNY: 5/10

SILLY: 2/10

FINAL SCORE: 7.5/10

cracks in the foundation: a look at the ruins (C3) (M!Bruno/F!Leone, word count: 1,218, Day 16: Breaking Point)

Some nice crunchy payoff. I do love a good screaming argument that digs into the fundamental flaws that keep the main couple from being together- in this case, Bruno’s emotional unavailability, his dedication to Passione, and his overprotectiveness. I also really like the thing I did where Bruno is just too tired to have this conversation because he’s been awake and being shot at for three days straight- I have a feeling that if they had this conversation when Bruno was more awake, it might go better and their relationship of obligation could keep going on for a bit longer. Reading it now, I’m not entirely happy with Leone’s dialogue- I think she comes across a bit too emotionally vulnerable for how I prefer to characterize her, and also I don’t like the ending lines, they feel generic.

ABBACCHIO PINING: -10/10

ABBACCHIO PHYSICAL PAIN: 0/10

ABBACCHIO EMOTIONAL PAIN: 9/10

CATHOLICISM: 1/10

HORNY: 0/10

SILLY: 0/10

FINAL SCORE: 7.5/10

anniversary (M!Bruno/M!Leone, word count: 1,540, Day 6: Reaching Out)

:3c I adore the bits where Leone is alone in his apartment, miserable and drinking and self-loathing- I feel like it has a very strong sense of place and really immerses you in his mindset. I also quite like how I characterized Bruno- he’s very serious and not very outwardly mushy and nice, but his actions are undoubtedly very kind, which is what I think of him and what I tend to aim for. On the other hand, Leone’s dialogue in the bathroom scene is just exceptionally mushy and vulnerable in a way that strikes me as a bit ehh, though there is the excuse that he is very very very drunk. Trademark Leone Abbacchio Down Bad Moment: him getting horny over Bruno pulling shards of glass out of his face. Good job on that one, me.

ABBACCHIO PINING: 9/10

ABBACCHIO PHYSICAL PAIN: 4/10

ABBACCHIO EMOTIONAL PAIN: 8/10

CATHOLICISM: 1/10

HORNY: 3/10

SILLY: 0/10

FINAL SCORE: 8/10

cracks in the foundation: even the sturdiest things (C1) (M!Bruno/F!Leone, word count: 1,181, Day 4: Bloom)

Oh, I love this one. The prose isn’t perfect, there are definitely parts where the emotions jump too quickly, but it’s just very delectably crunchy, especially with the knowledge of what’s coming up next. I was basically just going “what would cause BruAbba to break apart” and it’s the emotional repression, babes. The emotional repression. I’m planting the seeds for what comes next, I’m planting them very good and sexily, appreciate me.

ABBACCHIO PINING: 4/10

ABBACCHIO PHYSICAL PAIN: 0/10

ABBACCHIO EMOTIONAL PAIN: 5/10

CATHOLICISM: 1/10

HORNY: 1/10

SILLY: 0/10

FINAL SCORE: 8.5/10

Crawlspace (M!Bruno/F!Leone, word count: 764, Day 7: Trapped)

This one is both silly and hot at the same time, I’m quite proud of their banter and managing to maintain a good sense of building eroticism throughout. While originally I didn’t like the abrupt ending, I think it’s pretty funny in how it abruptly cuts off the building erotic tension and provides this mental image of two horny idiots falling on their faces in front of this group of stuffy older guys. Who they were spying on. It’s short, but I think that works in its favor- it doesn’t drag on for longer than it needs to.

ABBACCHIO PINING: 2/10

ABBACCHIO PHYSICAL PAIN: 3/10

ABBACCHIO EMOTIONAL PAIN: 2/10

CATHOLICISM: 1/10

HORNY: 8/10

SILLY: 9/10

FINAL SCORE: 9/10

overwhelm (F!Bruno/F!Leone, word count: 695, Day 8: Too Much)

Hot! Fun! Much better at getting into the POV character’s head and creating a sense of eroticism than Day 2. I also love Maria’s soft sadism, it comes across to me as being both hot and IC, which is the gold standard for smut writing. I don’t have anything else to say about this, it’s just some good porn I like.

ABBACCHIO PINING: 3/10

ABBACCHIO PHYSICAL PAIN: 4/10

ABBACCHIO EMOTIONAL PAIN: 0/10

CATHOLICISM: 0/10

HORNY:10/10

SILLY: 1/10

FINAL SCORE: 9/10

steel wrapped in silk wrapped in doubt (M!Bruno/F!Leone, word count: 409, Day 18: Tight)

This one might be short, but every single line of prose fits like a puzzle piece to put you inside Bruno’s head. Looking at it, there’s not a single thing I’d do differently. He’s horny for his wife and he’s a weirdo, two essential Bruno Characterization Elements. I did feel bad categorizing it as high as I did because it’s so short, but this is my fucking list and I do what I want.

ABBACCHIO PINING: 5/10

ABBACCHIO PHYSICAL PAIN: 0/10

ABBACCHIO EMOTIONAL PAIN: 2/10

CATHOLICISM: 1/10

HORNY: 6/10

SILLY: 1/10

FINAL SCORE: 9/10

Absolution (M!Bruno/M!Leone, word count: 942, Day 1: What If…)

Very good, if I do say so myself! It’s kind of lost its punch for me because I’ve had to scroll past it so many times to start writing, but I like the flow of sentences, the prose, and how I characterized Abbacchio even if you can tell that I’m the kind of person who screams BRUNO BUCCIARATI GET YOUR ASS BACK TO YOUR WIFE ON THE BEACH THIS INSTANT every time I watch Episode 28. This was the first piece I wrote, and I did do quite a bit of prewriting, so it had a lot of time to sit in the oven, so to speak, which is why I think it’s so good. Also I’m reading this in full and I forgot the Live Giorno Reaction gag I put in there, that’s so fucking funny, great job, me.

ABBACCHIO PINING: 8/10

ABBACCHIO PHYSICAL PAIN: 8/10

ABBACCHIO EMOTIONAL PAIN: 3/10

CATHOLICISM: 9/10

HORNY: 1/10

SILLY: 2/10

FINAL SCORE: 9/10

The Night Is Short (And Blood Is Young) (F!Bruno/F!Leone, word count: 740, Day 21: Feeding One Another)

Oh, I am so very proud of what I did with this prompt. It’s short, but it gets across everything it needs to, especially expressing the visceral, the blood and flesh and desire beneath your teeth. And also lesbianism. The mental image of them making out with flesh in their mouths is so fucking hot to me.

ABBACCHIO PINING: 3/10

ABBACCHIO PHYSICAL PAIN: 0/10

ABBACCHIO EMOTIONAL PAIN: 1/10

CATHOLICISM: 3/10

HORNY: 6/10

SILLY: 0/10

FINAL SCORE: 9/10

never let you go (F!Bruno/F!Leone, word count, 1,487, Day 23: Left Behind)

*me, taking notes from the goblin that lives in my brain* Fluffy…lesbian…cannibalism…

In all seriousness, while the start isn’t the strongest, once Maria gets Leone in her lap it’s so sweet and fluffy and tender while also being IC (at least to me). There are just so many parts I love, from Leone’s biting of Maria’s flesh being right over their marriage bite (while i do disapprove of many of ishida sui’s writing choices, i do appreciate the canonical fact that part of ghoul wedding ceremony is them biting each other on the neck. it appeals to me on a completely sfw and thematic level.) being a reification of their bond and they’re in LOVE and I LOVE THEM SO MUCH THEY’RE SO CUTE and LEONE THOUGHT HER WIFE WAS GOING TO LEAVE HER BEHIND BUT SHE DIDN’T-

I really think this fic benefited from being in Maria’s head- we can both how outwardly calm and nonchalant she is (in keeping with her canon characterization) but we can also see how inwardly she’s panicking and upset because she thinks her wife’s dead HAVE I REMINDED YOU THEY LOVE EACH OTHER??????

ABBACCHIO PINING: 8/10

ABBACCHIO PHYSICAL PAIN: 10/10

ABBACCHIO EMOTIONAL PAIN: 6/10

CATHOLICISM: 3/10

HORNY: 4/10

SILLY: 0/10

FINAL SCORE: 9/10

like a secret in your throat (M!Bruno/M!Leone, word count, 1,503, Day 12: Devotion)

Yes, I am emo trash. Anyway, premise premise premise this is such a great and fun premise! Abbacchio being endlessly self-sacrificing, Bucciarati keeping himself away because he doesn’t want to hurt his team, the opening lines of this are so good and I love the dialogue between the both of them. Wish wish wish that ContraPoints had gotten out her video on Twilight before I wrote this, the points about how both sex, especially penetrative sex, erases the boundaries between people in a way that we both want and fear is basically what I was trying to get at with Abbacchio’s internal monologue when Bucciarati drinks his blood. Trademark Leone Abbacchio Down Bad Moment: loving Bucciarati and hating himself so much that he wants to be subsumed entirely within his body. And about that blood-drinking, one of the many, many mountains I have chosen to die on WRT JJBA fandom is that everyone who erases the fact that JJBApires drink blood via the fingers in favor of a more conventional biting is a coward and it is my divine duty to fetishize the sucky pokey finger suck as much as humanly possible.

ABBACCHIO PINING: 9/10

ABBACCHIO PHYSICAL PAIN: 6/10

ABBACCHIO EMOTIONAL PAIN: 8/10

CATHOLICISM: 2/10

HORNY: 7/10

SILLY: 0/10

FINAL SCORE: 9.5/10

scars of various types (M!Bruno/M!Leone, word count: 585, Day 11: Scars)

This one is amazing. There’s not a weak part of the prose, it all comes together, sort of the Final Form of all the Leone And/Or Bruno Have Nightmares About Sardinia that I wrote for 5sentenceficathon. There are loads of little parts I like, it’s just very good at crafting a mood in a short period of time and also plays with the prompt in interesting ways, it’s not just about physical scars, but emotional scars.

ABBACCHIO PINING: 1/10

ABBACCHIO PHYSICAL PAIN: 9/10

ABBACCHIO EMOTIONAL PAIN: 4/10

CATHOLICISM: 0/10

HORNY: 0/10

SILLY: 0/10

FINAL SCORE: 10/10