Snowflake Challenge 2026-3: Love Letter to Fandom

[stardust_rifle]

This one is going to be hard.

I was not very mentally well when I was younger, due to getting ass-fucked by both genetics and life circumstances, and there are two reasons that I made it past age 15. One of them is that I'm very pain-averse.

The other is fandom.

Reading fic gave me something to do besides "lie in bed and feel miserable" and "move through my life like a zombie", and it sort of helped me... unlock the ability to feel emotions? I don't know how to describe it, but I'm very much (and still am) a Robot Person, and experiencing emotions through fiction was, for a while, the only way I could actually feel things, so I dove headfirst into melodrama in order to actually have an outlet for the pain I was feeling at the time, but couldn't express.

Additionally, you know the suicide prevention strategy of "you can't kill yourself until X happens?" Yeah, that was a big thing for me. "You can't kill yourself until Eternal Summer comes out." "You can't kill yourself until Attack on Titan finishes." "You can't kill yourself until that fanfic you really like finishes." "You can't kill yourself until Hetalia stops coming out."

So, uh, thanks, fandom. Thanks for keeping me alive.

Comments

[florianschild]

I'm really glad you had that support in your life and I hope it continues to be there when you need it. <3

[wavesagainstrocks]

I think it's real cool you had something you loved so much, that loved you back just as much if not more! Fandom can be an outlet in a plethora of ways, and you managed to fight such a tough battle alongside it.

We're glad you're here, friend! :)

[althea_valara]

For me it was Farscape. I wasn't really involved in its fandom, but I had to stay alive to see more of it. I think it's great that stories can affect us that much. I'm glad you had fandom when you needed it most.